We see so many different depictions of love in real life and in ‘reel’ life daily, that we sometimes tend to wonder which to follow. All these different views on love give birth to dysfunctional relationships everywhere. We end up adopting many beliefs as the only truth without really examining them more closely. Here are some myths about love that may be holding you back from enjoying a happy and healthy relationship.
1. Love hurts.
Love is meant to bring happiness and has healing powers no other emotion has. If you believe love hurts, you are going down a dangerous path. People who believe this end up enduring the worst kind of behavior. Believing in this ‘untruth’ only leads to unnecessary and unfortunate events and drama. The loss of love can hurt, real love never hurts.
2. Jealousy shows passion and love.
Although we don’t want a partner who is not interested in what we do, there is a huge difference between a partner who loves and wants to be with you and a partner who goes into a rage every time they are jealous. If you find yourself in a relationship like this, your partner is more interested in ownership, not passion or love.
3. Love is sacrifice.
This one is true to a very large extent. However, ask yourself what you are sacrificing. We all sacrifice preferences in our daily life for the ones we love and care for; be it a lover, husband, parent or children. This is vital for relationships. There is a line here that should not be crossed – the time you begin to sacrifice your values. Someone who truly loves you will never ask you to sacrifice your values and what you stand for.
4. Love will complete you.
This has to be the biggest myth of all time, shown over and over in movies so much so that people believe it. If you need a person to complete you, what will happen to you if the person is no longer in your life? The only person that can and should complete you, is you. An ideal relationship is made up of two people who complement each other, who come together and grow together. Before embarking on the search for love, you should love yourself and be happy with yourself. Finding a perfect partner is not going to do that for you.
5. Love is passion, romance and attraction.
Well…..this is another ‘Disney’ Movie Syndrome. If love was all about passion, romance and attraction, how do you explain thousands of couples who suddenly fall out of love? Most relationships do start off with at least one of the above elements, but sooner or later, they fade out and are replaced by more concrete and deeper emotions like devotion, respect and care.
6. Love is saying “I love you” often.
You would be shocked to know how many people think this is a fact and not a love myth. Although saying ‘I love you’ is music to the ears, it is not something you need to hear all the time, unless you are terribly insecure about your relationship. Actions that shout ‘I love you’ go a longer way than just words. Try it out…..do something nice for your partner and they will hear the ‘I love you’ in it without you having to even say it!
Love like you have never loved before. Learn how to love yourself first, only then you can truly love someone else.