Slow and steady progress is always good; but there is nothing like a strong decisive action to quit cold turkey when it comes to bad habits we all have. Look around you and you will see people who have annoying social habits. Look at yourself deeply and you will find some of these habits in you too. Cutting out these habits will make it easier to foster good relationships, so why wait?
1. Complaining for attention.
We all need a garbage truck to share our troubles with, usually in the form of a best friend or confidant. As relieving as it is, don’t make it a habit of always turning conversations down the negative way with complaints all the time. Complaining about everything that is wrong about your life will get you some short-lived attention, but beyond that, people will start avoiding you soon. It is an awful way to keep the attention going and a sad way to view your life.
2. Fishing for compliments.
When someone pays you a compliment, do you say:
‘Oh, I look awful today’, when you did go to the salon to get your hair done.
‘I just threw on something, when you did spend time looking for something nice to wear.
Stop fishing for compliments and graciously accept them with a thank you. Acknowledging a compliment is not snobby it’s a courtesy. Don’t go ahead with a self-effacing comment where the person has to be forced to repeat their compliment or never give you one again.
I am a very big fan of technology, but I draw the line of multi-tasking with technology while talking to someone. If you are talking to someone, talk to them, and that should be it. Don’t browse online, don’t reply to text messages, don’t watch TV and please don’t update your Facebook status when someone is talking to you. Whether they say so or not, all this really annoys the person you are talking to. If you are pressed for time and can’t talk, just be honest and find another time to talk or make it brief.
4. Cutting people off mid-sentence.
The only time it is probably okay to cut someone off mid-sentence is when there is a brainstorming session going on. Or if there is something urgent that has come up and you need to attend to. Or if you have not seen your best friend in a long time. Most of the time, interrupting someone is not a very nice thing to do.
Do you pretend to listen when your children talk about their day while your mind wanders to your work, errands and dinner? And do you really think your loved ones don’t notice that you are only half listening? They do. There is no greater gift you can give your loved ones than the gift of your undivided attention when required. Remember that to love is to listen.
6. An unsupportive attitude.
The greatest compliment you can give to your loved ones is to believe in them and let them know that you love and care for them. When you see something good and beautiful in someone, don’t hold yourself back, go ahead and express your appreciation. When you see something that may not be so good and beautiful in someone, give them your best wishes and blessings. Your supportive attitude is something you should carry with you wherever you go.
What else would you add to this list? Do you possess any of these traits and how are you going to change that?
Check out one of my favorite books – “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change” by Stephen R. Covey.